Didn’t sleep well last night, mainly because I had a nap in the late afternoon and woke up around 10:00 PM. Also because it was hot inside my house even I opened the window, but there was no wind coming in. My mind was also filled with thoughts, thought about buying a house, having a dog or a cat, changing job, and the money problem. At the end, I asked if I will be like this for the rest of my life.

I’m not sure why I’m unhappy any more. Before I thought it was because I’m alone. Now, I’m wondering if it is because my lifestyle, my work or I’m just unhappy. Before I hate my ex for dumping me and left me living a miserable life. Now, I don’t blame him any more, I just blame myself.

Everything happens for a reason, either I enjoy the result or suffer from the consequence. I choose the path and I don’t think I can blame anyone but myself. Just like last night, I chose to have a nap and then suffered from the outcome. However, life is easier if I can blame everything on everyone else. So I blame the company for having such stupid shifts.

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