Maybe I should forget about everything and look forward. To think what I can and want to do. Should I go back to Taiwan or go to China to get a better job and live there unhappily? Or should I stay here and to a little bit happier and just make enough money to go through my life?Maybe I should invest the savings, but I don't really want to take that risk. Ah life! I guess it is all about if you are willing to take the risk or not. Life is not necessary short, it can be long for some people, and short for others. Everyone's life is different, I cannot replace someone and live their lives. Even though I wanted to do that. I envy some people, think that they have a better life than me and wonder why they are so happy.

I don't think I am asking a lot, I just want to have someone by my side and be happy. I don't want to be extremely successful or rich, just enough money will do. I guess I want to have a family, a little bit lonely these days.

I like all the weekends I spent with my friends, share little stories amoung us and play mahjong. Mahjong has become a way of bounding for us, we laugh, we swear, and we scream together. It is fun, not because winning or losing, but we actually spend time together.

I wonder when I will die. Have you even seen the video music of Savin' Me? I think it's cool that someone can see how much longer a person's life is left. I wonder how many seconds are left for me. 

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